each day.

It’s quiet.
It’s early. My coffee is HOT.
The sky is still black.
The world is still asleep.
The day is coming.

In a few moments the day will arrive.
It will roar down the track with the rising of the sun. The stillness of the dawn will be exchanged for the noise of the day. The calm of solitude will be replaced by the pounding of the human race. The refuge of the early morning will be invaded by decision to be made and deadlines to be met. For the next twelve hours I will be exposed to the days’ demands. It is now I must make a choice. Because of Calvary, I’m free to choose.
And so I choose.

I choose Love.
No occasion justifies hatred; No injustice warrants bitterness. I choose love. Today I will love God and what God loves.

I choose Joy
I will invite God to be the God of circumstance. I will refuse the temptation to be cynical…the tool of the lazy thinker. I will refuse to see people as anything less than human beings created by God. I will refuse to see any problem as anything less than an opportunity to see God.

I choose Peace.
I will live forgiven. I will forgive so that I may live.

I choose Patience.
I will overlook the inconveniences of the world. Instead of cursing the one who takes my place, I’ll invite him to do so. Rather than complain that the wait is too long, I will thank God for a moment to pray. Instead of clenching my fist at new assignments, I will face them with joy and courage.

I choose Kindness.
I will be kind to the poor, for they are alone. I will be kind to the rich, for they are afraid. And kind to the unkind, for such is how God has treated me.

I choose Goodness.
I will go without a dollar before I take a dishonest one. I will be overlooked before I will boast. I will confess before I will accuse. I choose goodness.

I choose faithfulness.
Today I will keep my promises. My debtors will not regret their trust. My associates will not question my word. My wife will not question my love. And my children will never fear their father will not come home.

I choose gentleness.
Nothing is won by force. I choose to be gentle. If I raise my voice, may it be only in praise. If I clench my fist may it be only in prayer, If I make a demand, may it be only of myself.

I am a spiritual being.
After this body is dead, my spirit will soar. I refuse to let what will rot rule the eternal. I choose self-control. I will be drunk only by joy. I will be impassioned only by my faith. I will be influenced only by God. I will be taught only by Christ.
I choose self control.

Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness, and Self-control.
To these I commit my day.
I f I succeed, I will give thanks. If I fail I will seek his grace.
And then when this day is done, I will place my head on my pillow and rest.

~Max Lucado

beautiful ending.

This has been stuck in my head for a few days.
Its good.

Oh, tragedy

Has taken so many

Love lost cause they all

Forgot who You were

And it scares me to think

That I would choose

My life over You

My selfish heart

Divides me from You

It tears us apart

So tell me What is our ending?

Will it be beautiful So beautiful?

Oh, why do I Let myself let go

Of hands that painted the stars

And hold tears that fall?

And the pride of my heart

Makes me forget

It's not me but You

Who makes the heart beat

I'm lost without You

And dying from me

So tell me

What is our ending?

Will it be beautiful

So beautiful?

Will my life Find me by Your side?

Your love is beautiful

So beautiful

At the end of it all I wanna be in Your arms

At the end of it all I wanna be in Your arms

At the end of it all I wanna be in Your arms

At the end of it all I wanna be in Your arms

So tell me What is our ending?

Will it be beautiful So beautiful?

Will my life Find me by Your side?

Your love is beautiful So beautiful

"Beautiful Ending"

~Barlow Girl

good morning

I’m not too certain what time I got out of bed this morning, it’s the beauty of lake life. I know it was relatively early, but not dawns crack early. Regardless I had it on my mind that I was going to fish this morning, and everyone knows the best time to do that is early morning. I got some stuff around and walked out on the screen porch and was greeted by a dense fog on the lake. My mind trailed off into a memory of when I was young and took the rowboat out on a similar morning to this one, and couldn’t find my way back to shore. I smiled to myself remembering how Paca came to my rescue. I could hear the calm slapping of the water against the dock which disappeared into the fog, though I knew it was there somewhere. I decided to make my way out there anyway, I mean, I did invest in the fishing license might as well use it.

The staircase down to the lake greeted me with damp moss covered stairs and an uncanny amount of spider web strung from rail to rail, the sun streamed through the dewy webs at the corner of nearly every railing. I smiled and thought the spiders were sure busy last night, and opted to use my fishing pole to knock them down through the areas I was walking.

I got down to the dock and unsnapped the dewy cover from the boat and loaded my gear inside. I hopped in and unsnapped the rest, thought for a moment about testing my knowledge and taking the boat out. A usually on a trip like this there’s a rowboat around, or we bring one, and on mornings like this I’ll just troll around for a couple hours basking in the early morning calm on the lake. This year there’s only the speedboat. I thought twice and decided against it, opting instead to just sit across the back of the boat and fish from there until Pablo was ready.
Pablo is what I call my brother when he becomes my Chauffer while I fish. He’s not much of a fisherman and would much rather man the motorized things. He chose this name for himself, it makes me laugh.

By this time the early morning fog is lifting from the lake, revealing several fishing boats, and later the cottages start showing their faces from across the lake, and I exhale deeply as I listen to the herons and sparrows chime in to the other music of my morning.

It isn’t too long before my sister arrives, and starts belting from the screen porch words to me that I don’t really want to answer, I’m in the zone, but I do anyway, I’m glad she’s here. It isn’t too long before she makes her way down to the lake, as well as Pablo, sporting his moosen P.J.’s mom made him. The three of us and cooper (my sisters dog and beloved family pet) decide to take a ride to the “good spot” to hopefully have a little more luck with the fishing. Neither of them wants to fish, but I’m enjoying the company and welcome their offer to join me.

We sit for a while, as I cast in and out, fight with a couple fish to no avail. Lose a few worms, which win me some sarcastic comments from my siblings, but I don’t care, I’m living. Pablo turns on the radio in the boat and my sister instantly starts singing. I go for another worm and cooper shows up to sniff out what’s in the container and walks away with random dirt chunks hanging from his chin fur. I laugh, Rachel is grossed out, and this makes me laugh more. A swan family approaches and we reminisce about my brother’s near death experience with the swans from the day prior. We fill Rachel in and we all have a good laugh. As I cast and reel in I can’t help but be thankful for this moment, and for my siblings.

It s quickly decided that we’re hungry and ready to get back for some breakfast, so Pablo takes us home safely and as we climb the stairs back up to the cottage we are greeted by the smell of bacon frying and dad whistling whatever oldies tune he has playing on the old 8track radio player he found in the closet. Rachel instantly chimes in with song and soon we are all singing as we walk back into the screen porch. Mom can be found at her sewing table creating her latest and greatest, smiling along as the family gets things together for breakfast. Even cooper gets an egg as we all settle down on the screen porch for breakfast.

Just as we finish breakfast “brown-eyed-girl” comes on and my sister quickly turns up the radio as we gather up the plates and dishes and quickly clean things up we sing along. Mom scoops up the dog and smashes his face in to hers and dad starts dancing along in the living room with whichever daughter is nearest at the time. C.J’s already lost getting gas in the boats and air in the tubes.

I exhale and inhale deeply and relish the moment, knowing they are few and far between; wishing we could stay like this forever. With the oldies playing on the 8track, the lingering smell of bacon, and the sounds of the lake crashing against the shoreline. A new day awaits us.

.originaly written 7/24/09.